Well it’s been about 7 years since I’ve had an actual blog. This “new” blog shares it’s name.
I think i’ll do a quick video about the pronunciation and why I chose that name
on another day. When I did the first version of this blog, I really was focused on making a name for myself…I was like I can write myself into a position.
The problem was that there was no consistency, no actual voice of Alex, and the content was meh. I think the biggest problem was that I didn’t keep up with it and therefore, it failed. My focus wasn’t there. I got too caught up on moving to California and even then, I was running away from issues that I didn’t want to address. It was the beginning of writer’s block mixed with the emotional extremities that resulted from the move. I got lost in the sadness. It’s all good to go through your emotions but don’t get stuck in them.
It was always one thing after the other – moving apartments because it didn’t workout with your first roommate then your car is falling apart while you’re working at a job where you know for a fact that your boss isn’t your biggest fan. It became too much so I ran, I blocked out, and I partied whenever I could to distract myself.
Through it all, I’ve learned that in this life that isn’t guaranteed that you have to dust yourself off and try again. Actually, Aaliyah sang those words but I finally put them into practice. My biggest reason for coming back was because I needed a creative outlet where I could write, where I could talk about whatever,and do it all for me to share with the bit of the world that knows me.
It’ll be nice if a few people read this blog but seriously, I am writing to figure out where I go next. I really thought being in California would result in me working as a TV personality but y’all the plan didn’t go as I thought it would. Here I am letting you know that I have no clue what I am doing and what my next step is but what I do know is…that I am ready for the next chapter wherever that may be. My hope is that as I write for this blog that I can organize my thoughts and really figure out where I am going next…career-wise, location wise, and etc.
On the plus side, I get to be creative and try to come up with ways to engage with the twelve people that will read this blog. I am excited to use my creative side and see what I come up with. I know by opening up online that I am opening up myself to criticism.
I welcome it but seriously, what’s the negativity going to do to me? I don’t want to let it get to me because I’ve spent enough time being miserable and unhappy. It’s time to stay focused even with the noise that may come along.